Stuck to you
by whitetyger123
Summary: The results of Light's boredome. Also involves a metal pole in winter. Interesting. What ever could he be planning? Ok, don't try to find anything that goes with the story line. Too messed. Takada time! Please R&R!
1. The Plan

**Stuck by you**

The Plan

Light was bored. So bored, in fact, he decided to think of something to do. Amazingly, this something didn't include writing names in the Death Note until he felt like he had just run ten miles.

Luckily, it was winter already. This was crucial for The Plan.


	2. L

L

The first unsuspecting victim walked past. It was L. Perfect.

'Hey, L!'

'Yes, Yagami Kun?'

'Do you see this pole?'

'I am not blind, so it would stand to reason that, yes, I do see it.'

'Well, do you wanna know a secret?' Light's face mysteriously grew a smile, freakily resembling that of The Grinch That Stole Christmas. 'This pole is made of candy.'

'Do you think I am stupid, Yagami Kun?' Then he walked away.

Ten minutes later, L returned. The promise of candy was just too much to turn down. But, he soon found out that Light had been lying. It was just a metal pole. A _frozen_ metal pole.


	3. Near

Near

Near was next. He looked a little suspicious when he saw his idol stuck to a frozen pole, but, how could he question anything L did? It was L, after all.

'Hey Near.' Light came up to the albino.

'Bon bo ib, Bear!' Unfortunately, Near couldn't understand anything L was saying.

'So, Near, you wanna be like L, don't you? Well, as you can see, L licked this pole. He told me, before he did this, that it would really help the Kira case if you did the same.'

Near thought it over in his head. He really didn't see how this would help the Kira case, but if L had said it, it must be true. So, he, too, licked the pole.


	4. Mello

Mello

Mello walked over to see L and Near stuck to a pole, and Light looking quite satisfied with himself.

'What are you doing?' He asked. Light looked over.

'Well, you see, this pole is actually chocolate.'

'Really?'

'Why would L lick a random pole, unless it was chocolate?' The two stuck to the pole made weird sounds, but they were not comprehensible to Mello. So, he joined the others, and found out really quickly that this pole wasn't chocolate!


	5. Matt

Matt

Matt was getting worried. Mello had been gone longer the he said he would be. So, he went looking for him. His tinted goggles turned everything orange, so it looked even stranger when he saw three people stuck to a pole.

'Hey, you're Matt, aren't you?' A strange looking teenager asked.

'Ya, who are you?'

'Well, I can tell you who I'm _not_. I'm defiantly not Kira, that's for sure.'

'If you say so. So, why are Mello, Near, and L stuck to a pole?' Matt was getting confused. Why would Mello lick a pole?

'I don't know. But, I dare you to lick it.'

'I will have you know that I have much better things to do then lick a metal pole in the middle of winter.'

'Okay, well, in that case, I _double dare you_!'

'Ha! Is that the best you've got?'

'Fine! I Triple Doggy Dare you to lick this pole!'

Matt gasped. Triple Doggy Dares were hard core. He couldn't refuse one of those, and this demented teenager knew it.

'Stupid dares.' He muttered right before licking the pole.


	6. Mikami

Mikami

Mikami was walking by, when his inner voice told him to look to the side of the road. There, he not only saw a group of people huddled around a pole awkwardly, but also a teenager that was laughing evilly. But it was not this that made him look twice. It was the fact that the teen laughing evilly had no time of death!

'G-G-God? Is that you?'

Light looked at his disciple. 'Why, yes, Mikami, I am God. How are you doing?'

'I'm okay. How's the... God business doing?'

'Oh, it's alright. But, I want you to do something for me.'

'Anything.'

'I want you, Mikami, to lick that pole.'

Mikami blinked. Lick a pole? That was it? He thought God would have something for him to do that was a little less... childlike. But, God _did _tell him to do it...


	7. Mr Yagami

**Chief Yagami**

'Hey dad. How was work?'

Mr. Yagami walked in his house to find his son standing there. It had been a while since Light wasn't spending all of his spare time either locked in his room or with his girlfriend.

'Work was fine, Light. Thanks for asking. How was school?'

Light smiled. Perfect. 'School was great. I got a physics project. But, I actually need help with it...'

Mr. Yagami blinked. Light needed _help_? 'Oh?'

'Ya, you see, the project is to find out how many people can fit on a pole. Like, with their tong stuck. I've already done the equations, but I need to test the theory.'

Mr. Yagami sighed. Oh well. It was for school, after all.

Light led his father to the pole outside. He was surprised to see how many people his son had already gotten on there. And there was about to be another.


	8. Aizawa

**Aizawa**

'Light, why are these people stuck to a pole?'

Aizawa was tailing Light. But when he saw the pole full of people, he had to blow his cover. Light had already known it was him, anyway.

'Well, they all trusted me with they're lives. And, if you can still see him, L is there, so if he trusted me with his life, I can't be Kira.'

'...So, you're saying I should trust you, because a lot of people are stuck to a pole, and you didn't help them?'

'Well, when you put it _that_ way, it makes it sound like I _made_ them lick the pole. But, why would I do that? There is absolutely no point in making them lick a pole.'

'Then, why did they do it?'

'They wanted to.'

'Why didn't you lick it?'

'I had to watch out for aliens.'

'Aliens?' Aizawa suddenly seemed afraid.

'Well, ya, that's why they licked the pole. Didn't I mention that already?' Aizawa shook his head. 'Oh, well, the aliens told them that if they didn't lick the pole, the world would die. You're not... _paranoid_ about anything like aliens, are you?'

'Ummm, no, not paranoid. Should I lick the pole? Just incase?'

'If you want.'

So, he licked the pole. Light had known perfectly well Aizawa was paranoid about _everything_.


	9. Takada

**Takada**

Light looked at his collection of people. So far, he only had men. His pole needed some girls! What respectable man would he be if he was doing something with a pole, that didn't involve any hot girls? And he knew the perfect one...

In fact, he was going to meat her right now!

'Hey, Takada. How are you?'

'I'm doing fine.'

'Do you want to do something for me?' Light asked, in his Oh-so-fake voice.

'Okay. Anything you want.'

So, climbing out the window, Light got Takada to the pole.

'There is a spot right there that you could lick.'

'And, why would I want to lick it?'

'Well, as you can see, Misa isn't on it, and I thought... no, never mind, I'll just get her to do it.'

'No! I can do it! Please, Light, let me do it!'

'Well, if you really want to...'


	10. Misa

**Misa**

Now that Light had one girl on the pole, he needed another. And it just so happened that he was engaged to one.

'Light! I'm here! I was so exited, when you called and said you wanted me to lick your pole!'

'That's good Misa! But, I don't think you interpreted it right. Not _my_ pole, but _a_ pole.'

Misa looked disappointed. Light pointed to the pole full of people.

'So, why does Light-kun want MisaMisa to lick this pole?'

Light was glad that, by now, there was too many people on the pole for Misa to clearly see Mikami.

'Well, I had just asked Mikami to do it, and he said no, and that made me sad. I figured, since Mikami doesn't love me anymore, then maybe you don't, either, and I wanted to check to see... but, if you don't want to...'

'Oh, but MisaMisa _wants_ to do it! MisaMisa still loves Light-kun, unlike stupid Mikami. MisaMisa will lick pole for Light-kun.'

Light smiled evilly. This was too easy.


	11. Matsuda

**Matsuda**

Light looked at his pole, satisfied. That was fun.

He turned around, hoping that by the time spring came, they would all have forgotten this little incident.

Matsuda just happened to walk by, not even five minutes after Light had left. He saw the people. He recognized the people. He wondered why all the people were on the pole.

He went over to get a better look. They were all there!

He shrugged. If everyone else did it, there must be a point, so why not? He found a place (not easy to do), got ready, and licked. Latter, he remembered thinking, _Why did I do that?_


End file.
